We can waste so much time worrying about what challenges us personally and in our relationships. We can get easily overwhelmed with the details and wrapped up in the menusha that nothing gets accomplished. We can get so emotional wondering what others might think of our position or judge our character. Will they hate me? Will she be mad at me? I am afraid of the conflict! Will I feel bad if they are angry with me? I can’t say anything, can I?

I call this Shirley Temple Syndrome. People that function in this space overwhelm me! I am a “git-er-done” man myself. I try not to waste a minute worrying about the drama. The drama and the theatrics today feel like Shakespearean Play. People like this clearly drank too many Shirley Temples as a kid. Syrupy, sweet, pink with a cherry on top, literally makes me want to barf.

The other day a friend of mine was obsessing over and over about calling someone back. She was afraid to make the call because it could result in conflict so they didn’t. After a few sleepless nights she came to me and said,

“I am so overwhelmed, I haven’t slept in days worrying about calling returning the message.”

In the land of everyone has forgotten how to talk, I said; “PULL THE TRIGER and dial the damn phone!” Ready, aim, aim, aim, aim, talk about it, worry about it, sleep or don’t sleep on it, for gods sake FIRE the damn decision already!

embrace franknessThere is so much white noise in our lives that it really is hard to hear. You have to really listen close to what those around you are meaning to communicate. In all our political correctness we have forgotten how to relate to one another. Be “frank”, put it out there and face the conflict. My father was a “what you see is what you get sorta man.” His name was Frank, and he always said, my name is Frank and so that I am, frank and to the point!  Makes life a whole lot simpler if you are frank, no guessing, no drama, no trying to guess what your feeling, it is just out there for all to see, touch and accept. Yes, you could piss a few people off along the way, but if your open, honest and genuine in the end, people with have respect.

Frankness is defined as:  plainness of speech; candor; openness. 

We need to be plain in how explain ourselves. It is way easier to be open and simple about our complex lives. Stop the second guessing, stop the fear and talk with one another. The candor of your speech will be refreshing and most of the time welcomed if you are honest. The other percent of time when your statements are not welcomed, frankly, who gives a shit. Really, life is way to short to worry so much. Stop sweating the little things and your ability to achieve greatness with become attainable.

We could all benefit from going around practicing a little frankness.

Published by John Chianelli, Writer

I am second. I will share my experiences, as a child of God, husband to Daniel, father, best friend, brother, son, leader, professor, writer and photographer. My intention for this blog is to be random, with no plan, no list, no direction and no expectations. Very different from how I lived my past life. My journey has been blessed by the mercy and grace of God and unwavering love. I hope you enjoy reading and sharing my experiences of hurts, laughter, discovery, friendships, Christ, and my family. Temenos is a safe circle where you can be yourself with peace of mind. Temenos originates from a Greek word which refers to a universal instinct to create a protected, safe space in which to heal, restore and regenerate yourself. My temenos circle is a place to be still and seek Jesus. It becomes my place to pray, reflect in the word of our Lord to shrink, grow in him, and heal my soul. What is your temenos circle? By: John Chianelli ©John Chianelli and Temenos Circle. 2016-2011. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided the full and clear credit is given to John Chianelli and Temenos Circle with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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